I don't need love-- I need my life to work. And if you love the wrong person, or love in the wrong way, then your life doesn't work.
A big misunderstanding is to think that these two things (a life with love, a life that works) are things that go together-- common destinations along the path to relationship and family and home and stability. But you can't substitute one for the other, thinking that your love and hope you place in the other person will solve your life problems and "make" your life work. This misunderstanding leads to an imbalanced life and heartache.
You are responsible for your own life. You must make your life work, then you can love properly and from a place of stability-- without illusion.
But few of us pull that off. I certainly haven't.
So I choose to avoid love. I prefer to have a functioning life.
I also choose to avoid hate, or fear, or anxiety-- any of the strong emotions, really. If you want to make your life work, you must seek emotional balance above all things. If the people in your life help you with this, then keep them around. If not, then get rid of them or change your relationship with them. Nobody is worth living in an unbalanced way, tossed around by intense emotions. Or, if they are worth it, then they are worth doing it right.
